Being a woman of a certain age I am on the cusp of finally getting to say goodbye to my Flo. That is if she would only just leave already. This time around she was off somewhere living the leisure life for nearly four months. I was settling into the “wow, I guess I am an old lady now” train of thought when I felt those old rumblings, negative thoughts, anxiety, edgy hunger and pain in my left side. Flo makes me feel more vulnerable, nervous. I don’t like it. Flo showed Wednesday while I was at work. All high and mighty, sporting high heels and dragging a fully packed wheelie suitcase with her. I have always had a love/hate relationship with Flo. She made me nervous in my carefree youth. She was a lot like me, capricious and carefree, but she always came riding in to save the day. I loved her then, appreciated her and sang her praises. I hated her too. Angry after I got married when she betrayed me, always around never letting me become someone’s mom. I want her to go but I want her to stay. If she goes I will never have to buy her supplies, ever again. Oh happy day. If she goes she takes the rest of my estrogen with her. My hair will thin, my skin will crepe, my life light dimming. Should I Stay Or Should I Go Now?
In time I will get my opportunity to say my final goodbyes to Flo, begin the next chapter. I only hope I face the next half of my life( is there a half? or way less? only time will tell)with courage, humor, good friends, family, and adventure.